Five Times Merlin Fell in Love or Thought He had
by HeavenlyBodies
Summary: points at title NOTE: due to the nature of this fic there are mentions of Merlin/other pairings


**Warnings/Squicks:** nah, just slapdash writing on my part  
><strong>Disclaimer:<strong> not mine, never have been, never will be

**AN:** This was written off the cuff, in one sitting for **roseganymede** because nobody should get burnt 3 times in exchange fic. I'm not saying it's pretty and it's un-beta'd, but it's something, hope it can at least make you smile a little.  
>Since it's written off the cuff, "My Word Thing"- non-existent, mainly 'cause I really wanted to use the word autocratic and couldn't be bothered, lol. <p>

The first time was in Ealdor, obviously- he did have a life before coming to Camelot and before Arthur, but I get ahead of myself. As I said the first time was in Ealdor when the kind eyes of Karin seemed to light up the world. She was pretty and lithe and 3 years his senior, but that hadn't stopped him from being dreamy-eye whenever she walked by tripping over his own feet, in an even more spectacular way than normal. She'd smile and help him up then wander off to find Hector, who she looked at with all the affection Merlin had ever cast her way and he doted on her in ways Merlin could only dream of. That had been the first time.

The second time, not surprisingly was Will and despite what you might think it had nothing to do with why he left Ealdor. Will had been everything Karin was and more, it had just taken awhile for him to notice. Will was his best friend, he made him smile, and looked out for him, made him feel wanted and cared for, all the things he also did for Will, so it was only natural that they came together. They loved as only true friends could and when it ended, when they realized they would always be there, would always care and protect the other, well, that was natural, too.

Then there was Camelot, bright, shining, dangerous Camelot and with it came Arthur, arrogant, asinine, autocratic Prince Arthur, but again I move too quickly. The third time was Gwen, though it passed quickly enough. She had been a rock in a turbulent sea for him, everything in Camelot was new and frightening and then there was Gwen making everything seem normal and bearable. She'd been a friend when he'd needed one most and his fleeting crush had gotten him through those roughest early days- she was still one of his closest friends and he wouldn't trade that for the world.

The next time began with a jug of ale and a lazy smile. Gwaine had captured his attention the moment they meet; he felt his body tingle when they touched, and they touched a lot. Gwaine had been something special, he had shown Merlin so much, taking him under his wing, showing him another side of life he'd barely seen and when he had seen it was surly and dark, but with Gwaine it was mysterious and exciting and full of life. Gwaine was an enigma, wild and untamable, yet he possessed an honour that betrayed his feral façade. They had been wild together in so many ways, Merlin had known from the start that they would burn hot and fast. And when Gwaine left they both knew they had shared something special, something they would never forget and could never regain, but that didn't make them love any less, just changed it into something else, a friendship strong as iron and as hard to break. Yes, Gwaine had shown him much and taught him even more.

And finally, we get to the crux of this tale, Arthur, Crown Prince of Camelot, the man who would one day unite Albion and be the greatest king the world had ever known, the man who as far as Merlin was concerned was the greatest prat of all time. Arthur was beautiful, that was undeniable. His eyes could show such emotion the rich blues taking on different tints and hues depending on his mood and Merlin could read every one of them. His friendship was hard earned, but worth every pain even when Arthur had to be Prince and had to be above such things, it was still worth it, to have such loyalty and love directed at you, yes, for that Merlin could put up with _the Prince_; besides, he could read his eyes, could see the shine behind the stern almost heartless pretense. He was enchanting, he brought out the good in people, people could believe in him. He had values and ethics, and an Elysian beauty that was hard to explain.

Yes, as you may have guessed Arthur was the fifth and the only one that mattered as far as Merlin was concerned.

At first, he didn't know what to call it. He thought perhaps it was loyalty or friendship, it was everything he'd had with Will intensified. It was as strong as his bond with Gwaine only deeper. Being around Arthur was comforting in a way not even Gaius could give. Arthur was his world and he liked it, he was happy to see Arthur every morning no matter the mood he woke up in. Merlin knew it would change soon enough, it always did and soon Arthur'd be smiling his lopsided smile and calling him an idiot with affection instead of annoyance.

Surprisingly, or, possibly, not so, it was Arthur who finally made Merlin put the right name to what he was feeling and as one might expect he did it in his usual Arthurian manner. That is to say, overtly and brooking no argument. But then, it's hard to argue when you're pinned to a wall being kissed senseless- not that Merlin would've wanted to, not now.


End file.
